Monthly Archives: November 2017

Looking for Some Good News Today

 

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I’d been looking for some good news.  It seems like all the “news” we get is bad news.  I’ve even resorted to avoiding watching or listening to any news broadcasts.  I figure, if something is important enough, I’ll hear about it.  It’s true; we do get to see people helping each other during a weather crisis.  The reporters hail people who are out in their boats after a flood, or helping to rescue someone during a storm.  Why don’t we see and hear more, more “everyday” stories of heroism, of caring individuals, or groups of individuals?  Isn’t that news?  Not a question that hasn’t been asked before, I know.

Well, I happened across part of a story on NPR one morning about a family being swept away by a rip tide in Florida, so I “Googled” the story for more details.

The family was swimming at Panama City Beach. The lifeguards were off-duty when two young boys “disappeared” from their mother’s sight.  She heard them yelling for help so she swam out to help them with her nephew, mother and husband.  They were dragged out to sea, too.  A total of nine people were all caught in a rip current, a specific kind of water current that can occur near beaches with breaking waves and simply carries floating objects, including people, out beyond the zone of the breaking waves.

Then the miracle began:  People on the beach, total strangers, began forming a human chain.  Apparently, it started with a few swimmers and grew into a major effort of about 80 people as more and more beachgoers ran into the water to help.  Jessica and Derek Simmons were there and were able to swim to the end of the human “rope” to drag the helpless group to safety, according to a Today Show report.

“To see people from different races and genders come into action to help TOTAL strangers is absolutely amazing to see!!” Simmons wrote on Facebook. “People who didn’t even know each other went HAND IN HAND IN A LINE, into the water to try and reach them. Pause and just IMAGINE that.”

Gotta love happy endings…

My search for the details of this event led me to more and more stories of heroism and kindness, stories of inspiration, more and more good news.  There’s even a website called “The Good News Network” (goodnewsnetwork.org.)  Why aren’t there more of these kinds of stories being reported on the networks?  Why do the “News Feeds” on my phone always have several reports of human MIS-conduct instead of reports of human KIND-conduct?  I suppose that is what draws people in, or so they think.  I’d like to think they’d be surprised at how their ratings would soar by sharing inspiring stories like this one.  For now, I guess I’ll still have to go looking for “good news,” but at least I know it’s out there. Yeah, it’s definitely out there.

About Jan Schim

Jan is a singer, a songwriter, a licensed body worker specializing in CranioSacral Therapy, and a teacher. She is an advocate for the ethical treatment of ALL animals and a volunteer with several animal advocacy organizations. She is also a staunch believer in the need to promote environmental responsibility.

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Thanksgiving in America

In two days, Americans will gather for the annual Thanksgiving feast.  Thanksgiving is a very American holiday because it is associated with the best and worst of our society.

The first Thanksgiving was held before the U.S. actually existed as a country.  In 1621, the Pilgrims celebrated with the Wampanoag Indians. The Pilgrims were English settlers who fled Europe in search of religious freedom.  They were saved from starving by the local Wampanoag tribe who helped them adapt to their new neighborhood.

What happened next? The Pilgrims discriminated against anyone who was not a Protestant in the Puritan image. That meant English Quakers had a rough time in New England. The Pilgrims also rid their new neighborhood of the “heathen” Indians using methods that today would be designated as ethnic cleansing.

Thanksgiving was designated a national holiday in 1863 by President Abraham Lincoln. Why did he decide to create a national holiday? By 1863, the American Civil War had dragged on for three years. The south was losing the war but the north wasn’t clearly winning.

Lincoln needed a win and Thanksgiving was a symbolic victory. It also allowed him to reiterate his message of binding the country together by using the day to “heal the wounds of a nation.”  His aspiration was never fully realized as we see with today’s political divisions on issues of race, gender equality, religion and immigration.

In 1939, Thanksgiving was moved to the fourth Thursday in November by President Franklin D. Roosevelt. Why the fourth Thursday of the month?  The Great Depression was grinding on and FDR hoped to increase retail sales by creating more shopping days before Christmas. Today, early sales begin on Thursday and end with the Internet-crashing sales on cyber-Monday. American capitalism is obscuring the purpose of the holiday.

But in spite of the rampant commercialism and the ugly elements engaged in race-baiting, gender bashing, and anti-immigrant claptrap, Thanksgiving shines through.  In two days, people will gather to eat turkey, ham, stuffing, potatoes, cranberries, fish tacos, burritos, turnip greens, cornbread, fry bread, sushi, ramen noodles, curries, or hotdogs and hamburgers. Whether kosher or halal or nothing in particular, we’ll all enjoy the feast.

Our annual feast has evolved as our society has evolved. That’s the best tradition for an American holiday.   Happy Thanksgiving!

 

About Norma Shirk

My company, Corporate Compliance Risk Advisor, helps employers create human resources policies for their employees and employee benefit programs that are appropriate to the employer’s size and budget. The goal is to have structure without bureaucracy.

 

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The Other Side of the Couch – Best-Laid Plans  

 

I am a planner.  Identifying goals, making decisions about the best way to reach those goals, choosing among a variety of strategies are all easy for me.  I have rarely been a person who struggles with decision-making; in truth, it could be said that I sometimes make decisions too quickly – and reap the consequences!  However, in general I find the process of planning useful and rewarding.  I am comfortable with planning ahead; I like buying season tickets to the symphony or to a theater company.  I have rarely thought something like, “I don’t know whether I will want to do X in three weeks” – instead, if it is on my calendar and I have planned to do it, I do it.

I know that there are others in this world to whom the idea of planning what one is going to do in three weeks, or a week, or even tomorrow, is anathema.  “How am I going to know how I will feel at that point?”  “Let’s play it by ear.” (This last one is designed to make people like myself crazy.)  To these individuals the experience of spontaneity is of high value.  Checking in with one’s self in the moment, asking what is going on for you right now, being willing to listen to the moment-to-moment inner knowing that can guide decision-making, is paramount.

Most of us live somewhere in between these two extremes.  One of the dimensions measured by the Meyers-Briggs Personality Type Indicator (MBTI – www.meyersbriggs.org) is that of comfort with planning vs. comfort with spontaneity (the J-P dimension).  Not surprisingly, I am pretty far toward the J side.  One of the things I appreciate about the MBTI information is that neither of these positions is wrong.  The information about one’s self is helpful in understanding self and in understanding others.

A recent set of experiences, however, has helped me to challenge my own natural preference for planning.

I got a new knee.

Prior to this very significant surgery, I laid plans to manage what I perceived to be all contingencies.  Knowing I would be out of work for a time, I arranged coverage for clients who would need it.  I borrowed or bought equipment that I would need for recovery.  I estimated the time I would be out of the office and planed with my clients accordingly.  Everything was in order.

However – best-laid plans.

This phrase, well-known for its reference to the poem, “To a Mouse” by Robert Burns, essentially says that even the best-laid plans can be overturned by external and unexpected events.  The mouse’s nest was torn apart by an unexpected plow, and my plans for an easy and uneventful recovery were challenged by the realities of a very hard operation and some unexpected complications that have extended the timeline well beyond what I had hoped.

So – I am NOT yet back at work; I am NOT yet driving; I am NOT yet fully recovered after one month (which was my plan, even though I was told that the acute recovery period is generally six to eight weeks with a right knee replacement).  MY plan was to beat the odds, be the superstar patient who was off pain medication in two weeks, driving in three, and back to full functioning in four.

Well, my friends, today is four weeks, and I am not doing any of those things. While I am certainly on the road to recovery, the time line is longer, perhaps, even than the average recovery would be.

Today, therefore, I am living into the other side of the MBTI dimension – the side that focuses on present moment.  I am asking myself questions like – “What do you need right this minute?”  “What would help right now?”  While I still must plan such things as rides to Physical Therapy, I am much more in the moment than I am used to being.  I am finding it strange, but strangely comforting as well.

Perhaps I will grow through this experience into being a more balanced person, who both plans, and allows herself to know that sometimes plans don’t work out, and that’s ok.

Where do you fall on this continuum?

About Susan Hammonds-White, EdD, LPC/MHSP

Communications and relationship specialist, counselor, Imago Relationship Therapist, businesswoman, mother, proud native Nashvillian – in private practice for 30+ years. I have the privilege of helping to mend broken hearts. Contact me at http://www.susanhammondswhite.com.

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Starting a Business: The First Year

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As many of you know, this past year I became the co-founder of a new Pilates studio business. It’s been a tremendous learning experience, as I’ve navigated a partnership, construction challenges in our space, working with instructors, clientele, etc. And now, another change is afoot. But, I’m getting ahead of myself.

Perhaps the most significant part of this process has been sharing this all with a partner who is also a good friend. Many people warned me of the pitfalls of working with a friend, but we plunged in nonetheless. We began with many frank, honest conversations about our goals, fears, strengths and weaknesses. After spending countless hours, gallons of coffee and some legal advice, we hammered out a written partnership agreement. As our lawyer said, hope for the best, but plan for the worst- case scenario. Oh, those lawyers! To date, I’d say our partnership is strong. We listen to each other. We support each other even when we disagree. We consult each other before making large decisions. We continue to share a common vision for our business. For me, the hardest thing has been separating our friendship from our partnership, and knowing when to change hats. My partner is someone I value and treasure and it’s been challenging to introduce the high stakes of owning a business. But, I have confidence that we have a solid foundation and will continue to grow as a team and that I will continue to grow as a business-person.

During the course of this first year, we have faced significant challenges with our physical space. Our historic building is being renovated and our ground floor location has been in the midst of a construction zone. We’ve had to create workarounds for heating and air conditioning, the bathroom is in rough shape and there has been constant noise, dust and other inconveniences. But through it all, we’ve managed to grow, albeit slowly, and we’ve worked hard to maintain our positive outlook and maintain our studio to our high standards. Our clientele has been supportive and appreciative, too.

But finally, and here’s the big news, a space has become available that is everything we have wanted from the beginning. In fact, it is a space that we’d eyed during our first visit to the building, but it was occupied. We have now snagged it for ourselves and at the end of the month, we’ll be movin’ on up! The rent is a bit higher, but within our budget, and we believe this new space will help us grow our business. It is in a completed section of the building and one with significantly more foot traffic. We will be in the midst of a more vibrant, creative tenant group and we are excited! I am also anxious about the increased expense, nervous about making the move work without interrupting business, the list goes on and on. But just as we took the leap last year to start this venture, I’m optimistic this will be just the thing to help us get to our next step.

So what’s the big takeaway here? I’d say to anyone thinking of starting her own small business, DO YOUR HOMEWORK! Take your time, write a solid business plan, get your financing in order, and most important, have your support team in place. We could not have made things work without the support of our families and friends. We also have a network of trusted advisors we consult regularly. My partner and I believe in community and in being a part of something bigger than ourselves. And that applies in business and in friendship.

About Barbara Dab

Barbara Dab is a small business owner, journalist, broadcast radio personality, producer and award-winning public relations consultant.  She is the proud owner of Nashville Pilates Company, a boutique Pilates studio in Nashville’s Wedgewood/Houston neighborhood.  Check it out at  www.nashvillepilatescompany.com.  She is also the creator of The Peretz Project: Stories from the Shoah: Next Generation.  The Peretz Project, named for her late father-in-law who was a Holocaust survivor, is collecting testimony from children of survivors.  Visit http://www.theperetzproject.com.  If you are, or someone you know is, the child of survivors of the Shoah, The Holocaust, and you would like to tell your story please leave a comment and Barbara will contact you.

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