Tag Archives: life changes

by | December 4, 2014 · 5:00 am

The Road Ahead:  How I Stopped Making Excuses and Learned To Love, er, Like Running

Run.

I have a confession to make: I like running.

Not the most earth shattering admission, to be sure, but for me this is mind blowing.  You see, for most of my adult life I have had a love/hate relationship with this type of exercise and by that I mean mostly a hate relationship.  I have started running many times over the years, only to stop over and over for reasons ranging from tendonitis to a lack of time.  I have also invested in countless pairs of specialized shoes, fancy leggings, supportive bras and sweat-wicking socks.  Each of these also was a “culprit” for quitting.  The shoes just didn’t work with my plantar fasciitis, the leggings were too hot, the socks bunched up and the bras weren’t supportive enough.  You get the idea.

So what’s different this time, you ask?  I’ve been trying to figure that one out.  For starters, this past year I’ve packed on some unwanted pounds without changing much about my diet or lifestyle.  I’ve also been feeling sluggish and irritable and definitely not my usual perky self.  Added to all this is a general malaise and a desire for more challenge in my life.  I definitely want to recapture my energy and enthusiasm.  And while there is so much we can’t control, we can definitely control our exercise.  So off I went in search of some new physical challenge.

First in my quest was a personal trainer at the YMCA and a program of weight lifting and cardio, along with my regular Pilates regimen.  All went well for a couple of months and I really loved how my body was changing and becoming more toned and defined.  But one morning I awoke with neck pain so severe I could not move my head.  This continued for a couple of months and even with a lighter weight load, the pain and stiffness persisted.  So I stopped the weight training.

I have several friends who are runners and I began quizzing them on why they like it and how they train.  One friend calls running an “efficient” form of exercise.  She can accomplish some high level problem solving and planning while she runs.  Another runs so she can enjoy a foodie lifestyle with her husband.  Another just likes to sweat.  My weight trainer is also a runner and she didn’t start until after she turned 40.  She was my best cheerleader and encouraged me to just get out there and set small goals.

Once again, I invested in some great shoes, fancy leggings and a supportive bra and, joined by my new puppy Bentley, off I started.  The area around my house is very hilly and not much fun so after several weeks of hell, I headed to the local greenway, a flat nature trail that goes for miles.  The first day I decided to just run without tracking my speed or distance.  And I’m not going to lie, for the first 20 minutes or so I kept thinking of excuses to stop.  But I focused my gaze on the road ahead and kept going, Bentley at my side.  I’m not sure how far I ran that day before turning around and walking the last bit, but when I finished I felt great!  It was still hot and humid, but the feeling of accomplishment, of pushing myself to my limit, was exhilarating!

I’m now a couple of months into this running experiment and I have been tracking my speed and distance.  I’ve worked up to running 5 miles at a fairly good clip.  I’ve participated in two races, a 5K where I had my personal best time and a 5-mile where I ran and walked with my daughter.  I’ve lost weight, I sleep more soundly, I have found my energy and I feel like myself again.  I still spend the first mile or so thinking up reasons to stop, but so far I have been successful in keeping my gaze fixed on the road ahead, setting small goals to stay motivated and finishing what I started.  Efficient, challenging, good cardio; Sounds like life.

I really like running!

About Barbara Dab:

Barbara Dab is a journalist, broadcast radio personality, producer and award-winning public relations consultant. She currently hosts two radio shows locally in Nashville, TN. Check out her website athttp://www.zoneabouttown.com.

Barbara is also creator of The Peretz Project: Stories from the Shoah: Next Generation. Check it out at http://www.theperetzproject.com If you, or someone you know, is the child of survivors of the Shoah, The Holocaust, and would like to tell your story please leave a comment and Barbara will contact you.

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by | October 20, 2014 · 5:00 am

Getting Away From It All

Sunset

There is a quote that goes like this:

Take a rest.  A field that has rested yields a bountiful crop.

Ovid Roman poet (43 BC – 17 AD)

Recently, I took a weekend retreat with a group of women that was refreshing and exactly what I needed.  Focusing on spiritual principals and supporting one another, the time away from routine days and the opportunity to rest, was rejuvenating.  I take this trip each year, and it charges my batteries and makes me a better person in my job, and in life outside of work.  I am a better-balanced individual when I have a life outside of everyday tasks.

Giving myself permission to put the focus on me has not always been easy.  For some of us, it is on others that a good bit of our energy is spent.  I am finding that the more I make self-care a part of my routine, be it exercising, or journaling, the better all around I feel in my work, and the things that I do outside of my job.

This year I have made being active by getting outside and walking, jogging and hiking, a priority.  I am fortunate to live in a city with great parks and greenways.  If I can’t go for a weekend away, I can certainly go for an hour or two.  My favorites of late have been Beaman Park, Richland Creek Greenway and Radnor Lake.  For enjoying wildlife, these green spaces give a great opportunity to not only walk, but also see birds, deer, and sometimes turkey.  Working at Greenways for Nashville, I am knowledgeable about some of the many great places there are to visit.  New trails have recently been added to Metro Parks and Greenways at Peeler Park, and trails are soon to open along the Mill Creek Greenway near Lenox Village.  Greenways for Nashville’s website includes not only Metro Nashville’s Parks and Greenway maps and addresses, but also the State’s trails like Radnor, as well.  Click  here and find your place to recharge.

About Renee Bates

Renee is the executive director of the non-profit, Greenways for Nashville, a member based organization. In addition to growing private support for the trails and green spaces, she enjoys oil painting, hiking, nature and working in the garden. Renee is married to David Bates of Bates Nursery and Garden Center, a 3rd generation business begun in 1932 by a savvy woman, Bessie Bates.

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by | October 2, 2014 · 5:00 am

Happy New Year

 

L'Shanah Tova

This week marks the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah and the Day of Atonement, Yom Kippur.  For the Jewish community these are the most significant and most somber days of the year.  The 10-day period is marked by self-reflection, prayer, spirituality and perhaps most important, asking for forgiveness.  It’s notable that this time falls in the middle of the secular calendar, giving us another opportunity to refocus and recharge our batteries as we bid farewell to summer and prepare for the colder months ahead.

As I was anticipating this year’s holiday season and wondering, as I always do, if I will find the inspiration I seek, I received an email from a dear friend.  This friend has been through a tough year marked by a contentious divorce, the challenges of aging parents and worries about college-age children.  At the end of her email, she relayed to me some things she’s learned about herself this year.  It was filled with hope and optimism and…aha! Therein lay my inspiration.  So here I share with you some of my resolutions as inspired by my lovely friend of 20 years.

  1. Find time to enjoy simple pleasures. I am an adventure seeker and a high-energy person (duh!).  I will give myself permission to take a walk in nature without the goal of burning those extra calories.  I will take a bubble bath and not take work along with me.  I will listen to the music I really love rather than whatever is on the radio at the moment.
  2. Read more. Well, actually I read quite a lot, most of it news-related.  In fact I am quite a bookworm and love to get lost in a good book, but rarely allow myself the time.  This year I will read for pleasure, maybe even look for a book club.  Whoa!  Baby steps!
  3. Spend time with good friends. Hmmm, my life is already filled with plenty of amazing people.  But I find I tend to neglect spending quality time with those special friends who really “get” me.  These are the folks some refer to as “family of choice,” the ones who love me unconditionally and who, by their mere presence in my life, give me courage.
  4. Get more rest. This is perhaps the toughest goal of all.  See resolution #1.  High-energy people do not like to sleep much!  I usually subscribe to the “I’ll sleep when I’m dead,” theory.  However as I get older, I find I really do feel better with more rest.  So, without giving it an actual number, I pledge to add more rest to my days, or nights, depending on how it works out.

A short list, right?  Well I’ve learned it’s best to break my goals down into manageable chunks.  I find the spiritual goals are often the hardest to attain and to keep, but are also the most satisfying.  I invite you, even if you are not Jewish, to take this time to think about your spiritual goals and share them with us here at HerSavvy.

One more thing.  An important part of this season for Jews is asking for forgiveness.  So, if I have wronged you or caused you pain this past year, I am truly sorry and ask for your forgiveness.  And as we say in our tradition, May you have a sweet year filled with health, joy and prosperity.

About Barbara Dab:

Barbara Dab is a journalist, broadcast radio personality, producer and award-winning public relations consultant. She currently hosts two radio shows locally in Nashville, TN. Check out her website athttp://www.zoneabouttown.com.

Barbara is also creator of The Peretz Project: Stories from the Shoah: Next Generation. Check it out at http://www.theperetzproject.com If you, or someone you know, is the child of survivors of the Shoah, The Holocaust, and would like to tell your story please leave a comment and Barbara will contact you.

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by | September 30, 2014 · 5:00 am

The Other Side of the Couch: Worrying

Young Woman Biting Her Finger Nail

 

 

 

 

Are you a worrier?

So many people in this day and age are troubled by worry…worrying about what if this, and what if that…what will happen if this happens, how will I handle things if that…We spend precious energy on these what IFS, and too often in the process we lose track of the what NOW.

I spend many working hours with people who are troubled by many “what ifs.”  And it doesn’t help to be logical and explain that worrying isn’t very useful.  If worry could be affected by logic, it would not have the hold on us that it often does.

Worry, in many cases, is a message from our hearts (our emotional world) to our heads (our rational world) that is saying:  Be careful!  Watch out!  Take care!  Have you ever tried to be logical with a child who is frightened?  That’s about what it’s like when our rational brains try to tell our emotional hearts to calm down.

I have found it much more helpful to first accept the emotion:  “Of course you’re scared.  I understand that you’re worried about _____.”  It reminds me of being with my daughter when she was very young and was afraid of Gaston, the bully in Disney’s “Beauty and the Beast.”  I didn’t try to talk her out of her feelings; instead we found a ritual that involved telling Gaston to “Go away, scat, vamoose, you are not welcome.”  We did that together.  So the worry was met, not dismissed, witnessed, and together we created a different way of responding to it.

If you are worried, you might try:

  • Accepting the feeling
  • Taking a compassionate stance toward the part of you that is worrying
  • Creating a message of support that both witnesses and shifts the response.

Could change your head AND your heart!

About Susan Hammonds-White, EdD, LPC/MHSP:

Susan is a communications and relationship specialist, counselor, Imago Relationship Therapist, businesswoman, mother, and proud native Nashvillian. She has been in private practice for over 30 years. As she says, “I have the privilege of helping to mend broken hearts.”

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by | September 9, 2014 · 5:00 am

The Other Side of the Couch 4: Depression, Untreated, Can Be Fatal

Sad Teenage Girl

About four weeks ago I started taking a medication called a beta blocker.  This medication is taken by many people, and many do well on it, but others do not.  One of the side effects of this medication is depression.  I turned out to be one of those people for whom even a tiny dose of this medication leads to a rapid descent into depression.  I wasn’t sleeping well. I was waking up exhausted;. My appetite was off, and I began to feel hopeless and unmotivated to handle my daily obligations.  I began to cry frequently, and I could not stop thinking about Robin Williams and his sad death.

I am a licensed professional counselor with years of experience in the field and I recognized pretty quickly that these were not normal experiences for me.  I know the difference between being blue and sliding into a major depressive episode and I was on my way to the latter.  I called my doctor, stopped the medication, and almost immediately (within two days) was back to my regular self.  I was still sad about Robin Williams’ tragic death, but I was also able to stop obsessing about it.

Robin’s suicide may have been influenced by a medication that he was prescribed for his early Parkinson’s diagnosis.  Many medications can have these kinds of side effects.  Sometimes depression just happens without any particular cause.  Sometimes prolonged stress can tip one over into a major depressive episode.

Knowing the signs that point to depression can save lives.  If you notice sleep and appetite changes, thinking over and over again about something without being able to let go of it, negative thoughts about yourself, including feelings of worthlessness or hopelessness, fatigue, lack of motivation (that “whatever” feeling), and especially thoughts about death (They would be better off without me; I’ll show them; They’ll miss me when I’m gone) or any kind of thought about planning what you would do to die, SEEK IMMEDIATE HELP.  Depression can be treated, but death cannot.

Depression can manifest in children and adolescents somewhat differently. Often restlessness and irritability are components of this illness in minors.

A great resource for help with depression and other mental illnesses is NAMI.  You can find great information at www.nami.org.  It’s worth reaching out for help, because help is available.  Depression is an illness, just like any other.  Treat it like an illness, and get help.

About Susan Hammonds-White, EdD, LPC/MHSP:

Susan is a communications and relationship specialist, counselor, Imago Relationship Therapist, businesswoman, mother, and proud native Nashvillian. She has been in private practice for over 30 years. As she says, “I have the privilege of helping to mend broken hearts.”

Like what you’ve read? Feel free to share, but please… Give HerSavvy credit. Thanks!

 

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by | August 12, 2014 · 5:00 am

The Other Side of the Couch: What’s In A Name?

 

Late July and early August in Nashville can be overwhelmingly humid and uncomfortable.  However, yesterday and today have been little glimpses of fall…crisp air, sunshine, and temperatures in the 70s.  How delicious!

Because of this wonderful weather I have been outside more than I normally am (I am one of those Southerners who is overloved by all insects, in particular mosquitoes and chiggers…I can literally walk across a patch of grass and get attacked, while my husband seems to be immune).  In doing so, I have been enjoying the incredible display of a special kind of lily that happens at this time of year.

These lilies have many names.  I have heard them called Surprise Lilies.  Other names that I am now hearing are:  Resurrection Lilies, Pop-up Lilies, and (my favorite) Naked Ladies.  They start out in the spring with a massive amount of greenery, and no blooms.  The greenery dies away, and sometime in late July little buds begin to poke their way through the soil.  Within a day or two they stand up to two feet tall, spilling pink profusion and a sweet , intoxicating aroma into the summer air – an incredible display.  They line my driveway on either side, cascades of pink spilling up and astounding the eye.  My late godmother planted these lilies, and every time they bloom I am reminded of her legacy of beauty.

Surprise lilies – yes, because they are so sudden and so unexpected.  Resurrection lilies – yes, because they appear to have died and disappeared, and then unexpectedly are reborn.  Pop-up lilies – yes, because they literally pop out of the ground; I think that if I were there I could see it happen. Naked Ladies – yes, only a burst of petals topping a long, green stalk…no leaves, no clothes, so to speak.

Names matter.  What we call something has resonance and connects us to a larger world.  I use “surprise lilies” because that is what Marie called them, and by using this particular name I am connected to memories of her and of her special place in my life.  A master gardener, she spent the last twenty years of her life planting perennials and bulbs, creating beauty, and digging in the dirt.  She loved being outside.  I don’t love being outside, but I love the beauty that she created, and I love remembering her when I see her lilies.

Be aware of how you name things, and of how those names can create an entire internal story of remembrance.  Just like Proust’s madeleine, names evoke more than just an object.  They take you on an internal journey, filled with sight and sound and sensations…just as I see Marie, faded red hair wrapped in a kerchief, happily kneeling in the dirt and planting bulbs for a future she would never see.

Some Additional Thoughts on Names

  1. Be aware of how you name others.  Nicknames or descriptions determine perception.  If you are calling your child “the pretty one”, you can be sure she will learn that this is what you value.
  2. Notice how you name yourself. Many of us have an internal name-caller that isn’t kind.  Work with bringing compassion to your dialogue with you.
  3. Name the things you want in life…values, goals, directions. Naming is powerful.  Give yourself that power.

What is the power of naming in your life?  I would love to know.

About Susan Hammonds-White, EdD, LPC, MHSP:

Communications and relationship specialist, counselor, Imago Relationship Therapist, businesswoman, mother, proud native Nashvillian – in private practice for 30+ years. I have the privilege of helping to mend broken hearts.

 

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by | August 7, 2014 · 5:00 am

Another Year Older…and Wiser

Birthday

Today is my birthday.  My dear friend, Renee Bates, kind of got the jump on me the other day because it was also her birthday.  Nevertheless I want to honor myself by sharing some of my own reflections.  As a wife, mother and big sister, it’s not often I get to nab some of the limelight so I will milk this opportunity today.

These last few years have challenged me like no other.  Uprooting my settled, predictable life back home in Los Angeles was pretty tough.  I’m not going to lie.  It’s been hard to dig some new roots, let my brain create new pathways, open my heart to new possibilities.  Many people leave home at the start of their adult lives, but for me, this separation came much later and I confess I have been fighting a battle with my head and heart.

But I believe this year I turned a corner.  I’ve begun to rely on new friends and my local “family of choice.”  I still call my best friends and my sister for support, but I’ve started allowing myself to reach out to and trust my new connections too.  After all, when I’m having my morning coffee and starting my day, the sun hasn’t even come up in La La Land and I dare not call folks there!  So I’ll pick up the phone and chat up my Nashville friends to help get myself moving.

Holidays have been some of the toughest times.  Timeworn traditions add to the richness and meaning of key celebrations and observances.  Our home was always “that” house where folks gathered.  I’ve continued the practice here, but at times the absences at our table are a bittersweet reminder of what we left behind.  Still, in spite of myself, new memories are being made and new traditions are taking hold.

One of the hardest things to adjust to has been the weather.  Most people who know me know summer is my favorite time of year.  And lucky me, in Los Angeles it is always summer!  The sun is out most of the time, save for the odd foggy mornings in June, it rarely rains and the air is balmy and breezy.  It’s pretty hard to imagine anything better.  So to adapt to the changing weather I have created a more seasonal wardrobe; accumulated sweaters, boots, coats, scarves and gloves.  I’ve even braved driving the icy roads and the torrential downpours.  I still do not like the weather here, but I’m learning how to live with it.  Baby steps, after all.

So what are the lessons here?  Well I have learned I’m stronger than I thought.  I can ask for help and not feel ashamed.  I can ask for what I want.  It feels good to embrace change.  It’s important to take care of myself.  It’s fun to make new friends.  I still cherish my old friends.  Weather is an opportunity to go shopping.  Home and family are what you chose to make of them.  And, no matter where I live, I am still Me!  Here’s to another year older and, hopefully, wiser.

About Barbara Dab:

Barbara Dab is a journalist, broadcast radio personality, producer and award-winning public relations consultant. She currently hosts two radio shows locally in Nashville, TN. Check out her website at http://www.zoneabouttown.com.

Barbara is also creator of The Peretz Project: Stories from the Shoah: Next Generation. Check it out at http://www.theperetzproject.com If you, or someone you know, is the child of survivors of the Shoah, The Holocaust, and would like to tell your story please leave a comment and Barbara will contact you.

 

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by | August 5, 2014 · 5:00 am

Emerging

Emerging

 

This weekend I had another birthday. Since it seems I was 50 for only about 3 months, and enjoying that milestone and nice even number, I was surprised at the speed with which the next one rolled up.   It has been a great year.  Looking back to when I was coming up on THE BIG 5-0, however, there were things I wanted to have done by that time … be fit, be the ‘right weight,’ hike more, speak Italian, learn to paint, and so on.  While my life is better than I could have dreamed and I have many of the qualities that I value (strong friendships and loving family relationships), personally there were accomplishments I wanted to have achieved.

Because I lost three of my four brothers when they were fairly young, I look at birthdays as gifts and time as finite.  Life in my family seems not to be long-lived so, for this important fiftieth birthday, I embraced truly living deliberately … to do the things that interested and took care of me.  I wanted to no longer put off having experiences and a quality of life that I might never have if I didn’t get on with it and work with what I had (me) so, I gave myself permission.  It has been a great year. I have been getting up early to work The Artist’s Way, a book of recovering and growing our creating self, I am exercising often, even jogging, and taking myself out into nature regularly.  For me, today, life is to be lived on purpose, with purpose.  I have reached an age where I realize that honoring my truths, wants, and needs is the best way I can be in the world because when I take care of what I value (my wants, my health), I am a better and more loving person to those around me.   If I could go back and speak to my younger self, I would say, “Don’t worry so much.  Accept others as they are and don’t spend time thinking about what other people think of you.  Live the way you want, honor your belief system, and keep the focus inside your hula-hoop where you have some ability to change the things you can.  It is going to be o.k. ”

It is a gift to be this age, and to have had the experience that 51 years brings.  I have this knowledge, this place in time, and because life continues to grow and change, I am excited to get up in the morning and get on with the day and see what comes, more open to possibility and the places that I will grow.  I am emerging.

About Renee Bates

Renee is the executive director of the non-profit, Greenways for Nashville, a member based organization. In addition to growing private support for the trails and green spaces, she enjoys oil painting, hiking, nature and working in the garden. Renee is married to David Bates of Bates Nursery and Garden Center, a 3rd generation business begun in 1932 by a savvy woman, Bessie Bates.

 

 

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by | July 31, 2014 · 5:00 am

Health Savvy: Don’t Forget the Easy Things!

Female Doctor 2

 

 

 

 

You know the regimen of taking care of yourself: each day you avoid processed foods, eat modestly, enjoying fresh fruits, vegetables and fish or lean meats; you get your body moving at least 30 minutes 5 days a week; you watch your blood pressure and risk of diabetes; you get your mammograms, colonoscopies and Pap smears; you get a good night’s sleep each night and make sure your family does, too. Right. Creating the conditions for your health to thrive is practically a full time job.

What if there was something easy you could do that requires just a few minutes once a year? What if you could lower the chances of debilitating and life-threatening diseases without a second thought? What if insurance would likely foot the bill? As a specialist in preventive medicine and public health, I remind people daily of one of the easiest and most under-appreciated ways to stay healthy as we age: immunization.  Below are listed a few vaccines routinely recommended for all adult women (and men) at different points in life. For more details, you can visit www.vaccineinformation.org or www.cdc.gov/vaccines/adults

  1. Every woman, every year: Influenza (flu) vaccine. The only reliable way to cut your chances of catching the flu each season. How well it works depends on the season and on your immune system, but it’s inexpensive and widely available, so why not? It comes as a nasal spray, a short under-the-skin injection or a traditional injection: get whatever is convenient and appropriate for you. You cannot afford to get sick and spend a week in bed, or worse, so make this part of your annual self-care regimen. For efficiency, get any other vaccines you need at the same time.
  2. Every woman: Tetanus, diphtheria and pertussis booster (“Tdap”). We all need a vaccine against tetanus and diphtheria every 10 years. If you haven’t had a Tdap yet, don’t wait 10 years…go ahead and get it now. It provides added protection against pertussis, or whooping cough, which has been on the rise in recent years because (regrettably) neither vaccine nor illness provides long lasting immunity. It causes a miserable cough illness that lasts weeks in adults and life-threatening illness in newborns.
  3. Speaking of newborns…All pregnant women should get 2 vaccines during every pregnancy: flu vaccine and Tdap. Influenza during pregnancy can be especially severe, and newborns can catch deadly pertussis from mom or others. By vaccinating during pregnancy, mom’s body shares her protective antibodies with her unborn child, helping protect baby in the earliest weeks of life.
  4. All women through 26 years: Human Papillomavirus vaccine (HPV). This vaccine prevents infection with strains of HPV that cause 70% of cervical cancer and other types of cancers in men and women. It’s routinely given to preteens, but this vaccine is essential cancer prevention for any woman under 27 who hasn’t had it yet.
  5. All women 60 and up: Shingles (zoster) vaccine. Anyone who has had chickenpox can come down with shingles, a painful rash that develops from reactivation of the chickenpox virus inside a nerve. If you are 60 or older, your chances of coming down with it are 1 in 3. The shingles vaccine, given just once to everyone over 60, can cut that to 1 in 6. If you do get shingles anyway, you’ll be much less likely to experience the debilitating pain some sufferers endure for months.
  6. All women 65 and up (and some earlier): pneumococcal vaccine. The “pneumonia shot” is recommended once after turning 65, but watch this space! New recommendations for additional protection may be coming very soon.

This list just hits the highlights of routine vaccines. You may need others because of your health. The Affordable Care Act (ACA) requires your insurance plan to charge no deductible or co-pay if you receive them from an in-network provider. Coverage is a bit more complicated under Medicare, TennCare and “grandfathered” plans not yet subject to ACA. Ask your healthcare provider, insurance plan or pharmacist to see what your benefits are. The savvy woman doesn’t pass up the chance to optimize her health.

About Kelly L. Moore, MD, MPH

Dr. Moore is a public health physician, with a specialty in preventive medicine, who works to minimize the burden of vaccine-preventable diseases.

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by | July 15, 2014 · 5:00 am

Loss and Renewal

Glad painting 1

My mother passed away just over three months ago.  Though she had been having some health trouble, her passing came as a surprise to family and friends.  She was tough and withstood tremendous discomfort.  Heard often to say, “Breakfast is my favorite meal of the day,” she was cooking her breakfast on Friday morning, went into the hospital in the afternoon and passed away on Tuesday evening after just two and a half hours in hospice care.  I miss speaking with her every day, hearing her daily synopsis of the news, what was going on with family, and her laugh.  I miss sharing the birds that I had seen, and taking her for car trips to see the birds and other wildlife.  Mother was dramatic.  When we would see a hawk perched on the Vine Street Christian Church steeple, along the roads or soaring overhead, she would often exclaim, in her delightful southern drawl, “Ohhh, ah do love the fowl”.  I miss her entertaining ways.  Our family misses her way with words and phrases.  Mother had more colloquialisms than you could shake a stick at.

I have heard that the depth of loss doesn’t sink in until some time has passed.  I believe that to be true now.  It has had its stages with me and will continue evolving.  Having lost both parents and three of my four brothers, I can say that even though it is difficult to let go, there is a beauty surrounding the event like nothing else I have experienced.  When we have had loss, everyone is unified, grieving and pulling together, loving and supporting one another, as at no other time.  Let me say that I do not want to lose anyone else to experience this again, but I am more accepting.

Because there is time freed up with no longer looking after mom, and because I jumped right back into work after she passed, I recently took a week-long sabbatical to the mountains and did something that I have never done but always wanted to do…I took a painting class.  It was lovely because the teacher, the talented and inspiring artist, Kim Barrick, was encouraging and generous.  I rented a small cottage all to myself and had the luxury of time to fully dedicate into creating and learning something new.  I made new friends and to my surprise saw an old friend.  In the mornings we hiked, in the afternoons we painted.  It was heavenly to have space and time all to myself in the evening.  My cottage had a screened-in patio with a lawn and old growth forest beyond.

Of course, birds were everywhere in the mountain village.  My mother would light up when you mentioned a Wood Thrush.  I had not seen a one in probably 15 years. For the entire time that I was there, a Wood Thrush sang to me.  The first morning that I heard the varied and beautiful song, I wasn’t quite sure if it was the Thrush.  In the early morning of the second day I stood inside the patio and wished and watched for it to fly into view, hoping to get a glimpse.  Sure enough, it briefly flew into the yard.  It was a Wood Thrush!  Not only did I have the melodic song almost nonstop from dawn to dusk, I had Pileated Woodpeckers, Towhees, Wrens, and tons of Robins (in the thrush family, much more common.)  There was also a Cooper’s Hawk that I was alerted to when I heard the whole community of birds squawking.  They were doing their best to run him off as he tried to steal the babies from the wren’s nest, unsuccessfully, I will add.  This collective of art and nature was a spiritual experience and life changing.  I felt, and still feel wonderfully, wholly loved, taken care of, and that I am doing the right thing.  I found that I actually have some ability to paint and want to learn more techniques.  I want to grow this.  I have begun working through a twelve-week course, ‘a spiritual path to higher creativity’, with a book titled The Artist’s Way, by Julie Cameron.  I will let you know how it goes.  In the meantime, I will relish the renewal.  Though I won’t be able to physically show my mother the paintings, I think she knows just what I am doing.

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